Wording Your Modern Wedding Invitations
The topic of how to word invitations has been coming up a lot lately! So I thought it might be a good time to record how I try to approach this often-sensitive topic. Let me first emphasize that there are traditional ways of doing this, but my feeling is that each couple should use the wording that feels the most natural for them and their situation. These days, it is largely a matter of personal preference, and giving attention to matching the tone of the text with the tone of the wedding itself.
We usually begin with the save the date. Here's the traditional verbiage I typically suggest:
Save the date
for the wedding of
COUPLE'S NAMES
DAY, MONTH, YEAR
CITY
Formal Invitation to follow
WEBSITE
For the invitation card specifically, I start with this general outline:
With great joy/With joy in their hearts
NAMES OF ALL PARENTS WHO ARE HOSTING
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of their daughter/children
BRIDE/GROOM
to/and
BRIDE/GROOM
at TIME OF DAY
on DAY MONTH YEAR
at LOCATION
Merriment to follow
This is a traditional format, and assumes that someone's parents are hosting. By "hosting" I mean providing substantial financial support for the wedding. However, in many cases, parents are not footing the bill, and the couple may be paying for the wedding themselves. In this case, I usually replace the top section with "Together with their families."
One scenario I've come across a number of times is the bride's parents are hosting and the groom's parents are not, but the couple feels the groom's parents should also be included. In this case, I recommend the following format.
With great joy/With joy in their hearts
BRIDE'S PARENTS
request the honor of your presence
at the marriage of their daughter
BRIDE
to
GROOM
son of GROOM'S PARENTS
at TIME OF DAY
on DAY MONTH YEAR
at LOCATION
Merriment to follow
I also recently have really been liking a more minimalist approach, which allows for some more modern and artful updates to the visual formatting of the page. In the case that you do this, it's helpful to include a wedding website address on an additional card so that exact details can be easily accessed. Here's an example of something a bit simpler, where the lettering for the names can potentially be very large and/or flourished.
BRIDE and GROOM
invite you to their wedding
DAY of MONTH
at LOCATION
For RSVP card wording, here is my go-to text:
RSVP
The favor of your reply is requested by DAY of MONTH.
Your names______ or just M_______
Accepts/Declines
The RSVP card is also a great place to request dinner choices, if your caterer will need them.
In the case that you need dinner choices, I write the following.
Please initial each guest's dinner choice. (with lines below each meal option)
--
Lastly, the details card is where I list all other important information. This can include anything you'd like, and typically features accommodations, parking info, attire info, and/or wedding website url.
Here is a starting place for your Details Card wording.
Please join us for an evening of
cocktails, dinner, and dancing (or merriment) at
RECEPTION VENUE
at TIME O' Clock in the evening
Transportation from CEREMONY VENUE to RECEPTION VENUE will be provided.
Black tie optional.
Find all the details at our website.
WEB ADDRESS
Finally, if you suspect even a little that any parent or involved party will be touchy about whether they are included on the invitation and you are open to their input, it's a good idea to reach out to them and have them review the wording you are planning before you submit final versions to your stationer. While this may take a bit longer, it's less expensive than having to reprint and less stressful than having a text fight with your future mother-in-law a few months before your wedding!
If we are working together and you have any questions about specific ways to word things, please reach out to me. I like discussing etiquette and would love to help!